As Father’s Day arrives, us dads, stepdads and other father figures get our one shining moment in the spotlight … and we certainly don’t want to waste it.
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In the six-plus decades I have been doing my thing — many of those years in the communications business — I have grown to love a good joke, to notice the subtlety of solid word play and to appreciate sarcasm in any communication.
As a youngster, my mother taught me the nuances of crossword puzzles while my dad and I read the funny papers together.
As we raised our daughter in the aughts, my wife and I had a fun time with language, and dad jokes became standard fare.
And today, in the prime of my life — that’s sarcasm, folks — I realize dad jokes are keeping me relevant.
The surprising power of a dad joke
They are corny, they are stupid, but they are also unifying. X and Insta are perfect breeding grounds for us all to work on our material.
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And apparently, there is some science behind it.
I can spice up, or prolong, any staff meeting with a dad joke. I’ll even take a pity laugh or courtesy smile if they are that bad.
On Sundays, I spend a few hours each week with some friends at a local senior center, and they love short, punchy jokes — the cornier, the better.
I read somewhere that dad jokes aren’t bad jokes. They’re tactical communication. You’re meant to roll your eyes. That’s the point. That’s the bond.
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Nothings beats Dads telling Dad jokes 🤣 pic.twitter.com/Gm2Y2XFh0H
— For The Dads (@ForTheDadsPod) June 18, 2026
My colleague Caitlin Keith, who has been rolling her eyes at my dad jokes for a couple of years, offered to help me freshen a list of ultimate dad jokes, and I must say, she nailed the assignment.
From Caitlin: While I am known to roll my eyes or sometimes complain about Chris’ weekly — and sometimes daily — jokes, I have to admit they are fun.
Since I am clearly not a dad myself, you may be asking, “Why is she helping with a list of dad jokes?”
Well, I’m here to prove that dad jokes are for everyone, not just dads. Young or old, male or female, dad jokes can help bring a smile (or a grimace or eyeroll) to just about anyone’s face, and I hope that’s what this list does for you.
Not only can they be told to anyone, they can be told by anyone. So have some fun this Father’s Day (and every day after) and take the time to annoy and delight those in your life with the corniest and stupidest of dad jokes.
Now back to Chris.
10 dad jokes to unleash on your loved ones this Fathers’ Day
So here is our list: five are hers, five are mine, straight from my dad-a-base. Can you guess which is which? Let us know which is the best and which is the worst.
(Although, as I have told my daughter for more than 30 years now, German sausage is the wurst!!)
- Just built an ATM that only gives out coins. I don’t know why no one’s thought of it before: It just makes cents!
- How do you deal with a sad astronaut? Just give them some space!
- What happened when two slices of bread went on a date? It was loaf at first sight!
- I hate perforated lines, they’re tearable.
- Why do crabs never volunteer? Because they’re shell-fish!
- I’d love to have kids one day. But that’s as long as I can handle them!
- I was reading the dictionary in bed last night, but I didn’t make it very far. I got up to P!
- I threw a boomerang months ago. Now I live in constant fear!
- Apparently you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff!
- When I was a kid, bedtime was 9 p.m. I couldn’t wait to be a grownup so I could go to bed anytime I wanted. Turns out that is 9 p.m.!
So, fathers of all shapes, sizes and job descriptions, have a great day. The spotlight is on. We are united. We are strong. Let’s hitch up our cargo shorts and put our ball caps on backward, and deliver the best dad jokes we can.
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