Two years have passed since Olympic break dancer Rachael “Raygun” Gunn was thrust into viral infamy for her memorably disjointed breaking performance at the Paris Olympics.
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Gunn’s time on the Olympic stage was brief — less than 10 minutes — but it sparked a viral frenzy, making her the subject of global fascination and, oftentimes, a punchline.
She was parodied by “Saturday Night Live” comedian Rachel Dratch on “The Tonight Show.” Adele paused her own concert to talk about Gunn, while comedian Trevor Noah imitated her moves during one of his bits. Even Australian Prime Minister Anthony Albanese weighed in, applauding Gunn for having “a crack.”
Gunn was also the center of an online petition that called into question her qualification for the Games, falsely alleging she and her husband and coach, Samuel Free, cheated to secure her spot on the Olympic team.
Now, as the aftershocks have finally quieted, Raygun is speaking out in the recently released Netflix documentary “Untold Raygun: Breaking Badly,” sharing the toll viral notoriety took on her. “I can’t just be a meme,” she tells viewers.
The documentary chronicles how Gunn made the move from academia to breakdancing, her bumpy path to the Olympics, and the viral fame that followed — including a deluge of memes, misinformation and conspiracy theories surrounding her Olympic qualification.
“When I went viral, it was surreal,” Gunn told CNN. “It made me feel kind of sick in the stomach — this sense of dread. I just thought, ‘Surely, this is not actually happening. Surely, this is a weird, egotistical dream I’m having where I think my face is spread around the world.’”
“It was a really strange experience.”
Speaking out now felt like the right time. After two years of distance from the Games, Gunn says she’s had the space to process what she went through and focus on her mental health.
“I feel like I’m in a good place to share my side of the story,” she said. “There was a lot of noise, and I think there’s something to be said for waiting for that noise to die down.”
Panic in the Olympic Village
Hours after arriving at the Olympic Village, Gunn had a panic attack. She had seen the physical strength and years of practice her competitors had put in, and she felt like an imposter.
In just a couple of weeks, she would represent Australia in breaking — a sport making its Olympic debut. Already, it had become clear to her she would not make it past the first or second round.
“That imposter syndrome was so big,” she told USA Today. “I hadn’t grown up in an elite sports environment, and now to be in the ultimate elite sport environment was a really difficult (thing).”
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“How that feels physically, emotionally, psychologically, it really impacts you on multiple levels,” she added.
Gunn competed against French breaker Sya “Syssy” Dembele. She described her performance as “tough,” knowing she moved differently than the other breakers. Her doubts were confirmed by the final score: Raygun (0), Syssy (18).
When Gunn finally watched her Olympic performance, she recalls thinking, “Oh, it’s not as bad as I thought!”
Moving on
Gunn’s Olympic career is over, but she is dancing again — something she considers a feat in itself.
“It was hard to dance again,” she told USA Today. “My whole body just felt like lead.”
“I couldn’t feel properly, I couldn’t move properly,” she continued. “It took a long time, but I’ve got the most supportive husband in the world, and he just constantly was like, ‘Why don’t we just try this? Or why don’t we just try this?’”
She went through several forms of therapy in the wake of her viral infamy. Mindfulness and meditation didn’t work for her, but the most beneficial lesson was learning to distinguish between what she could control — her own actions, thoughts and responses — and what she couldn’t, like public opinion and the media’s portrayal of her.
“For me, it’s more about radical acceptance of everything that’s happened and just one foot in front of the other, just trying to move ahead,” Gunn told CNN.
“The work has been worth it,” she added, “because I can sit here today and say that you can go out there and be yourself. Just because people rubbish you doesn’t mean that you should be scared of going out there and being yourself.”
Gunn believes her experience has made her stronger, more confident and free.
“The world’s already laughed at me,” she said. “What are they going to do now? Laugh at me? Been there, done that! Come at me. I don’t care anymore, really, I don’t. So it is certainly liberating and freeing.”
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